MotoGP: 2017 Round 11 - Austrian Grand Prix
Laps: 28 Total distance: 120.9 km / 75.0 miles Circuit Record: 1'24.561 Andrea IANNONE (ITA) 2016 Average Speed: 182.4 (km/h) Top Speed: 313.0 (km/h)
Yo MotoGP Raps!
Eminem featuring Dr. Dre - "Guilty Conscience"
NARRATOR: Meet Rossi, thirty-eight years old Fed up with bikes and the way his championship's going, He decides to rob the concessions store But on his way in, he has a sudden change of heart And suddenly, his conscience comes into play
DRE: Alright, stop!
DRE: Now before you walk in the door of this concession store And take a fake trophy out the drawer You better think of the consequence
ROSSI: But who are you?
DRE: I'm your fan club president and conscience
EM: That's nonsense! Go in and gaffle the trophy and run to Colin Edward's crib And borrow his racing suit, and one of his blonde wigs. Tell him you need a place to stay You'll be safe for days While you stretch your legs at his dirt track on mopeds
DRE: Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to The whole paddock knows you and they'll expose you! Think about it before you walk to the counter first. Look at the booth, he's older than George Burns!
EM: Forget that! Do that ish! That kid's a snitch! Then make a post about it, hash-tag Marc's a witch! Why care if he's fired? Is he in your clique? Tomorrow he'll run Cheng Shin tires to feed his kids!
DRE: Man, don't do it, it's not worth it to risk it!
ROSSI: You're right!
DRE: Not over this shit
DRE: Drop the biscuit
ROSSI: I will!
DRE: Don't even listen to Slim yo, he's bad for you
EM: You know what Dre? I don't like your attitude
NARRATOR: Meet Dovi, thirty-one years old. Seeing an aerodynamic fairing at a rave party, Things start getting hot and heavy in a paddock room. Once again, his conscience comes into play
EM: Now listen to me, while you're kissin' her paint And twisting her throttle, I slipped this in her tank. Now just distract Lorenzo, maybe nibble on his earlobe
DRE: Yo! His contract's only a couple of months old You shouldn't take advantage of him, that's not fair!
EM: Yo, look at the tires, do they got air? Push the bike to our side, on that spot there Then we'll lie and say we don't know how it got there
DRE: Man, ain't you ever seen that "The Kentucky Kid"?
EM: No, but I seen the porno with SunDoobiest!
DRE: You wanna risk getting hauled off to jail?
EM: Forget security, push it to our side and bail!
NARRATOR: Meet Marc, a twenty-four year old MotoGP racer. After coming home from a hard day's work, He walks in the door of his paddock trailer home To find his trophy in bed with another man.
DRE: Alright calm down, relax, start breathin'...
EM: Forget that ish, you just caught this trophy cheatin' While you're on track she's with Viñales tryin' to get off? Forget melting it down, cut this trophy's plaque off!
DRE: Wait! What if there's an explanation for this is?
EM: What? She tripped tripped over the podium and landed on it?
DRE: Alright Shady, maybe he's right Marcy But think about the championship before you get all crazy
EM: Okay! Thought about it, still wanna melt her? Grab her by the base, kick Maverick out 'cause he won't win her? That's what I did, be smart, don't be a retard You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped Dee Barnes?
DRE: What you say?
EM: What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember?
DRE: I'm gonna get you sucker!
EM: Ah-ah! Temper temper! Mr. Dre? Mr. N.W.A.? Mr. CBR rolin' straight outta Compton y'all better make way? How in the hell you gonna tell this man not to be violent?
DRE: 'Cause he don't need to go the same route Fenati went Been there, done that, oh forget that What am I sayin'? Let's do a burnout Marcy, where's your RC at?